Four of the am again at the castle this morn, temperature is a smidge on the lower liquid metal numbers, the kitchen is finally empty of broken computers, and I think I have worked out the reason for my lack of dream time. The normal hour for rising is six of the am at the Castle, but I think that what is left of my brain is conditioning my battered body for the PPP Tourism strategy otherwise known as “Daylight Saving” and getting me used to waking two hours early so that when it comes in I will be in sync. If this is how I will feel all the time I think I will be sticking to GMT. Still having problems with Weebly, connecting to the dashboard, emails from readers telling me that the site is scrambled on their browser-sigh…… And while I am in this state of confusion:
The Middle East, all of it, every bleedin bit of it, all the despots, dictators and greedy bastards, and each grain of sand which is irritating me like that “Thing” you get in your eye that you can’t get rid of, sod diplomacy- nuke the lot of them and then oil will be cheap, it may glow in the dark a bit but at least we will be able to fill the motor up.
Don’t care, won’t go, won’t watch, too expensive, too embarrassed.
The Big bloody Society-again
Crap idea from a crap un-elected “government”, who just want the voters to do their jobs for them.
And his patronising missus, who cares?
Jezza, Hamster and the other tosser.
Over paid, over rated, over advertised and over the top, living in a parallel world-“”One of the reasons Top Gear works is because we are three fairly ordinary blokes. You can identify with one or the other of us, be it age, height, presentation or manner… and one of the traits we bring together as a team is a certain outspoken quality.”
Bollocks, more like three middle aged arse holes coining it in and taking the piss out of the world.
If it wasn’t for the “over paid” and “coining it in” bit that could be me, wonder if they need a fourth presenter?
And finally:
Which will mean that if two flakes of the white fluffy stuff fall together the whole of Blighty will grind to a halt-again.
The cost of next month’s national census is expected to reach almost £500 million as 30,000 officials are hired to ensure immigrants who do not speak English take part in the compulsory population count.
Guidance on how to complete the 32-page form has been translated into 56 languages while advertisements are being broadcast on ethnic minority TV channels and leaflets distributed to shops, mosques, churches and temples.
It is a legal requirement for everyone to complete the census, which takes place once every 10 years, with the next national survey due to be conducted on 27 March. The results are used to help plan public services, including school places, hospitals, and transport.
Persistent refusal to complete the form can lead to prosecution and a fine of up to £1,000.
But the Office for National Statistics, which organises the survey, admitted that while three million people failed to complete the 2001 census, only 38 were convicted.
Not bad odds those, it only seems like ten years since the last one, I wonder if there will be a “none of your fucking business” section this time?
A warden gave a one-legged woman in a disabled bay a ticket – despite being shown her false limb.
The attendant “nearly fainted” after Sylvia Taylor, 67, rolled up her trouser leg and said: “Take a look at that.” But he still refused to cancel her fine.
Sylvia, who lost her left leg when she was 16, forgot her disabled permit when she parked at a shopping centre and returned to find a £70 ticket on her windscreen with the warden just yards away. She said: “I explained but I thought he didn’t believe me.
“So I rolled up my trouser leg to show him my false limb – there was no arguing with that. He wouldn’t cancel it but told us to write to head office to explain.” Car park bosses told her she must pay up but later cancelled the fine after she wrote an appeal.
Sylvia, of Llanedeyrn, Cardiff, had been shopping in the city with daughter Lynne Solly, 40, who said: “When my mum exposed her amputated leg, I thought he was going to throw up – he looked absolutely horrified.”
Lynne wrote to Euro Car Parks for her mum but was told the fine must still be paid.
An ECP spokeswoman said it had since been cancelled but warned: “If you forget the badge, alternative parking should be sought.”
Or in other words-hop it (what?).
How to get about in China, the recipient of a 2009 Red Star Design Award (China’s equivalent of the red dot awards), the three-wheel Bubble Bike sells in China for RMB 5000 (around US$730).
The Bubble Bike is electric, meaning it recharges from a power point for a negligible cost and has oodles of grunt for getting up to its 45 km/h top speed. Now we understand that’s not so fast by the standards of the big cities with lots of space that we’re accustomed to, but it’s plenty fast for urban running in the highly congested streets of China’s megacities.
The Bubble Bike has a range of 100 km and takes between six and eight hours to charge from a standard household power outlet in its current configuration. The manufacturers are currently trialling alternative batteries which decrease the charging time to three hours and increase the range of the vehicle to 200 km, and increase the cost of the Bubble Bike by several hundred dollars.
So they haven’t invented the pedal in China then?
A Belgian artist who tattoos pigs has set up a workshop in China after his technique was banned in Europe.
Wim Delvoye, 46, has opened his controversial art farm in Yang town, Shunyi district, Beijing.
His artworks are sold, after the pigs have been killed and skinned, for as much as £100,000 a time.
Europe banned the tattooing of animals after a German court ruled pets should not be tattooed because it causes unnecessary pain and suffering.
The court, at Munster, came to its decision after hearing a complaint about the number of people tattooing animals after Delvoye started the trend by tattooing eight pigs with Louis Vuitton logos for his Art Farm exhibition two years ago.
Further cases included a man who wanted a Rolling Stones tongue on his pony’s thigh which the court ruled was not in the interest of the animal, was for the owners’ personal interest and was against animal protection laws.
Delvoye decided to move to China after lawyers advised that the German court ruling could see him liable to prosecution anywhere in Europe.
Tattooed Pigs-Belgian-that explains it.
The annual No Trousers Day took place in January in a number of world cities, including London and New York.
And, not wanting to miss out, Taiwan got in on the action a month later. No one’s quite sure what the hold-up was.
Up to 20 Taiwanese girls bared (almost) all on the way to work as they travelled on the underground wearing just their knickers.
Event organisers said: ‘We saw the event in New York and wanted to stage one here – why not?’
No Trousers Day started in New York in 2002 and sees participants with bare legs mixing among other commuters.
The mission, apparently, is to cause scenes of chaos and joy in public places.
It’s too early to say if that’s been a success or not in Taiwan.
Certainly cheered me up, I always seen to miss these things, I must check my Facebook page more often.
The existence of the so-called “God Particle” Higgs Boson theory could be proved within two years or it probably does not exist, Large Hadron Collider scientists have said.
Officials at the Swiss-based accelerator have announced that the £5bn machine’s closure had been put back by a year because it was running so well.
Scientists had been due to shut down the accelerator at the end of this year for a major refit but that has been put back until the end of 2012.
The decision means that scientists will have another year to carry out physics experiments while the machine is running at half power. It will then shut for 15 months before reopening to run at full capacity.
The beam energy for 2011 will be 3.5 TeV (trillion electron volts). It is designed to run at a maximum of 7 TeV.
No wonder my leccy bill is so big.
And finally:
Ladies sauntering 2
And today’s thought: If you think experts are expensive . . . wait and see what amateurs cost you.
Angus
